I know my site deserves some love, long neglected (the last post is 21 months young). I will see what I can do. I was stuck deciding whether to migrate all my audio files to html5 and reformat the appearance so its mobile friendly. That was back in December of 2013. One thing at a time-I have recently resumed some improvisation recording, and additionally, there are still items that needed to be updated…You will know when it is done.
1: works on pc, going to work on andriod/apple/mobile soon
2: sometimes the whole track would need to be loaded before playing. does that mean the player cannot stream?
3: Lets try does this wok on widgets. and HTML 5 too..
…before I continue, should I say resilience instead of fortitude..?
…Oh right, I meant to talk about how do I actually get by everyday, sans the brilliance, of course. I wanted to avoid even mentioning about “getting by” because those words almost seemed like surrendered utterance describing the sad state of our lives as some pointless run-of-the-mill exercise, not in futility, but ironically rather for crucial sustenance, something as farcical as grinding our gears for the sake of keeping the gears grinding …perhaps, even the ‘thing’ that which further ontologically reinforces the belief that whatever I have been doing is indeed my most natural course of action, self affirming and all the while self-denying.
I truly am thankful, don’t get me wrong.
It’s just that lately I started to recognize the choice that I made and its resultant consequences has multifaceted implications. So I was about to share such insight, my epiphany, I suppose, to you all—Yet I realized as the older I get, the less I get to write, no, the less I get to write freely; not because I lacked the time to think and ponder upon matters important to me, as a matter of fact, time is the lone possession that after my trade(off) that I have substantially more of when comparing to others.
I suppose I simply am not convinced that its gainful labor to put what is on my mind into walls of text that is neither concise nor pristine. (not yet anyway.) This issue concerning…um, quality? Has continuously gaining the upper-hand when it is paired with creativity. It’s truly a skill that needs to be mastered, the understanding and its resultant dexterity discerning when is the most opportune time to open up the gates of the judging hell, and let the editor come in, armed with the sword of preconceived notion on one hand and the shield of malevolent perfectionism on the other…
It’s mightily perplexing to me because considering my years on learning, studying and training free-improvisation and musicianship during university and my following wilderness years has already examine the subject of our psyche in an exhaustive manner. I precisely knew what needs to be done, in theory anyway. Memory is a double-edged sword when it comes to judging, and I tend to fall upon it multiple times. For pleasure, why, of course.
And before I senselessly babble on furthermore, the solution is acceptance, without any doubt. (…?) It is broken, it is bad, but it is what I do. And doing what you do is the point, as far as I can tell; because you are being what you can be, no, what you ought to be. I firmly, staunchly abide with this declaration for as long as I recognized its existence, thus it’s somewhat humorous, whimsical even that I have been telling everyone and comforting them when they failed to achieve that they don’t have to be the best, they simply have to be their best, yet I started to see How I myself did’t really believe in what I say.
Do let me elaborate: I don’t think I am unique that I have several modes of operation and would change as situation requires. I pretty sure we can divide it into 2 to 50 levels, kind of like Scientology, but lets stop at 3: At the lowest, shallowest (yet the most far-reaching) there is this professional(functional) level where for the sake of the flow(whatever that is supposed to mean) all inquiries that might warrant further investigation I simply would give responses that are most useful yet least pertinent. I have yet to find the möbius loop-as far as I am concerned the scale of usefulness and relevance is factually dualistic.
The next level is both contentious and tempestuous. Because the cause, whatever it is has actually (for once!) warrant further instruction, explanation, or both. The stakes are higher, thus so are your ante. These are the moments where you would constantly (re)examine its risk-reward analysis. This is also a simple question “is it worth it?” would drive anyone insane. Because at the end of the stick (no matter how short it is) is what is held dear to you. Sometimes its something tangible, say, people, or things. To me, it’s some absurd ideas that I valued, things like honor, integrity, respect. No matter. Whatever they are, and more importantly, however you definite them, sadly, are not absolute, and their rank can be altered.
The ultimate level is religious. No, I am not talking about our Lord Jesus Christ; I am talking about things that we do which are beyond reason and logic. We would do them anyway, regardless. I suppose sometimes things, or people would get into this level of conviction. Perhaps. To me usually this is where those value I mentioned just before lies. Veracity. Constancy. Goodness. Doing what is right. Not therefore you can get a pat on the back—let it be your boss, or your wife, or your son, or your friends, or your God, but simply because you have acted how you are designed to act, naturally—and that is the only way to avoid our great (predestined) tragedy: Instead in our perfect forms manifesting, we are drowning in our own blemished existence.
it is important
to reach for the stars
despite you realized these hands which we own
can hardly caress the treetops.
it is just as important
to look around and use your arms
to embrace, to comfort others
which is just as heroic,
if not nobler.
Thanks to my brother I now have this fancy tablet to put into good use. I know i can log in via chrome browser for a more complete post entry, yet this particular entry were made via the WordPress app.
Just changed WordPress theme to 2014 after update. Goal is convert all music player to html5. The church christmas oratorio project is officially completed and I really should get to the fixing & improving of the website long in dormant mode. Wasn’t in the mood before, crushed with all of the various commitments. Might have a brief wrap up and reflection but really prefer using the time more wisely.
The TCBC link and pages are broken along with the plugin shortcode update; I will fix them as soon as I can. Afterwards I will work on the vocal demos and pdf/youtube embed links.
[Nov.11 mini postscript update: It took me the night trying to add the [su_] prefix in front of every single shortcode of the page, then when I finish updating and in process to check if everything is returning to normal, I saw the “update available” icon and lo and behold, its yet another shortcode update for wordpress plugin. Made me wonder whether being lazy and not learn the html code is a good idea after all. This is being way counter-productive than I have expected.]
[also admire the irony of mini postscript being lengthier then the original post, yay!]
Using MediaElement.js is as challanging as expected-I don’t know html and lets not even get started on creating or editing css or phps…just managed to post shortcodes on this specific WP theme’s widget after some google-researching, managed to froze the site twice with error 500 before going to hosting site’s file editor to restore…Then also just realized there isn’t a playlist available…Wish I can spend more time making music instead of trying to make the site work, ugh.
But now come to think about it, perhaps I would change the style of audio player, may be some sort of icon-button style which you can press to play and press again to pause/stop; because there would probably be more smartphones and touchscreens a simple squared button style for activation would work better then a traditional audio player with playlist which are fine only when you have a mouse with you.
I also got started transcribing again, my improvisation recordings are numerous but the rendered scores are few.